TWO!!!

I can't beleive you are two today. I would write more, but you keep me very busy. Happy Birthday Bear.

Blessed

I am probably the luckiest person in the world. I have the most wonderful support system in the world. Yes my parents are only an hour away and they are wonderful, but right here on the island I have some of the best friends you could ask for.

My yard was bad. The back yard was capable of swallowing Bear and keeping him there hidden very well. The front was getting rather shaggy. I had every intention of getting out there and mowing it last week, and I got the mower out and I couldn't start it. So I put it away. That night my friend Mama Geph called and offered to come over and mow. Now this is where I must say that I have a VERY hard time asking for help. I can do it myself and that is it. Well I have gotten to the point where I can't do it myself. I need help. I just had a very hard time asking for it. And she was persistant. So on Saturday her and her entire family came over and her wonderful husband worked for 3 very hot hours in my yard. It looks wonderful now and I cannot describe the weight that has been lifted from my shoulders. I got to hang out with her and her kids and relax and pick weeds. I just cannot describe how grateful I am that they gave up their Saturday afternoon to come and help me.
And then there is D and H. Their husbands have watched Bear countless times so that us girls can go out and have fun. I know that I could call them in the middle of the night with any problem under the sun and they would be there for me. These 3 women have been such good teachers to me. I met them all about the same time that I became a mommy and I have learned so much from all of them. How to be a mommy and a wife just by watching them. I know that I will keep in touch with them for the rest of my life. I am going to miss them like crazy when I move and I don't know how I am going to handle that, but I will cross that bridge when I get to it. Probably with a lot of tears(and kicking and screaming) but it is a bridge I have to cross.
Thank you to my friends. Thank you for making the last 8 months do-able and fun. I hope that someday I can be as supportive as you have been to me.

Okay, last whining session I promise.

Well they want to buy it. We are going to do it this afternoon. I wish that I could come down with something, bird flu, SARS, anything to use as an excuse that would be justifiable in my mind to get out of this. He seems like a good kid. Of course he is going to act his age (19) in it. He is going to take of off-roading. He is going to see how deep of a puddle he can drive it through without stalling or flooding the inside of it(about 3 feet). He is going to see how sharp of an incline he can put the right side of the Jeep on before it falls over. He is going to take the top and the doors off and blast music. I know this because I did all of this. He is going to have fun in it. And that is what it is meant for. I should feel happy for this kid. He gets to go back to school in the fall in a cool Jeep. Do you think it would be ridiculous of me to ask him to send me pictures of her through out the years? Probably, but I am going to anyways. And I am going to try and keep the tears at bay when I hand over the keys. At least until he drives away, then I will go ahead and let them flow. I might be calling one of you tonight for some emotional support. Or maybe not, my throat is starting to feel scratchy and my finger hurts, maybe I am coming down with something, I think it might be Congenital Hypertrichosis Lanuginosa.

Harder on the Bear

I went to show the Jeep to a prospective buyer yesterday. I made the mistake of bringing Bear with me. I parked right next to the Jeep and got out to open it up so the kid and his dad could take a look. Bear, still in his carseat, was fine at this point. We spoke for a little bit and I handed them the key to the Jeep and they started to get in. This is when Bear started crying, hard. I went back to get him and he was saying something but he was crying so hard I could not understand him. By now the kid and his dad were in the Jeep loooking around getting ready to drive off. I finally understood the words "Fun-(gasp)-Jeep-(gasp)-ride-(gasp)-bye-bye!" amist all the crying. He was looking right at the Jeep and pointing and doing everything he could to get out of my arms. This went on until they came back 5 minutes later. They got out of the Jeep, closed the doors and he was suddenly fine. No tears, not even a wimper. He did get a little whiny as we drove away from her a few minutes later, but nothing like when some stranger drove her away. So from now on when I show or finally sell the Jeep, Bear will be in a safe place where he won't have to be subject to the horror of watching someone else drive away in our "fun Jeep ride." I just wish that I didn't have to put myself through the same horror.

Happy Mother's Day

A baby asked God, "They tell me you are sending me to earth tomorrow, but how am I going to live there being so small and helpless?"
"Your angel will be waiting for you and will take care of you."
The child further inquired, "But tell me, here in heaven I don't have to do anything but sing and smile to be happy."
God said, "Your angel will sing for you and will also smile for you. And you will feel your angel's love and be very happy."
Again the child asked, "And how am I going to be able to understand when people talk to me if I don't know the language?"
God said, "Your angel will tell you the most beautiful and sweet words you will ever hear, and with much patience and care, your angel will teach you how to speak."
"And what am I going to do when I want to talk to you?"
God said, "Your angel will place your hands together and will teach you how to pray."
"Who will protect me?"
God said, "Your angel will defend you even if it means risking it's life."
"But I will always be sad because I will not see you anymore."
God said, "Your angel will always talk to you about Me and will teach you the way to come back to Me, even though I will always be next to you."
At that moment there was much peace in Heaven, but voices from Earth could be heard and the child hurriedly asked, "God, if I am to leave now, please tell me my angel's name."
"You will simply call her, 'Mom.'"
- Unknown

I feel so blessed to be able to be called "mommy" every day. I love this little story, I had heard it before a few years back, but when I read it now, it takes on a whole new meaning. I realize the enormity of having the title of "mommy." The responsibility that God has trusted me with, to take care of and raise these two little people. It scares the crap out of me most days but I wouldn't change it for the world.

Happy Mother's Day to all of the wonderful women that share the awesome job title of MOM.

It does my heart good

I love that now when I put Bear to bed, be has to take a book to bed with him. Not just to sleep with anymore, but he lays down, pulls the book out and reads it. He will say "Night mommy, I love you. Close the door please." And if I linger at the door too long watching him, he will stop what he is doing and say "mommy bye bye." And then back to his reading. I love it.

Jordi LaForgen it...

Training him early...

A boy and his dog...